Parenting After Loss or Miscarriage January 2009

[Willow]

Michelle - glad to hear you're feeling OK. Guess it's pretty normal, good and bad days

Just quickly - finding myself kinda wanting to paritcipate in prg/baby name etc etc threads but a few times I've nearly posted and dobbed myself in...you think it's time for a BB announcement and ticker?? Ooooooooooh, I just don't know if I'm ready Stoopid I know, but it scares me to 'put it out there'.

[Freya]

I say jump in feet first Willow and let everyone be totally excited for you and cheering you on! You'll always know you have tons of support should things not go the way they should, not that it wont be perfect

[~Jayne~]

GO WILLOW GO WILLOW! GO, GO, GO, GO WILLOW!!!

It's about time you put the ticker up & the announcement so that I can keep track of all these people who are growing babies!!!!

[BekZ]

Go on Willow, I have the same opinion as AnnaT. I love thinking about names, please share your ideas.

I have a serious case of post scan anxiety. One week has passed since the scan and now I am worried that some thing is going to happen I bought my self some maternity clothes yesterday and I now I think I've jinx myself. I am also anxious about Sara and Loren leaving me too, on man these prego hormones are making me silly atm... Sorry for the luney tunes rant

[Willow]

Bek - if you're a looney tune so am I and my scan was only 2 days ago! I also brought myself a maternity top today (only cause it was on sale for $15 at pumpkin patch, I really don't need new stuff but it's nice to not have to wear the same old things again and again). Have been three times in the last week to try on mat jeans cause I desperately need a pair (well not in this heat but eventually!) and they are yet to make it home

Too bloody hot to stay in here posting (it's 43 here today and our a/c doesn't reach this far) but will BBL tonight.


**ETA: OK, I"m gonna do it now!! EEEEEEP.

[mako]

YAY Willow on your new ticker I did a long post earlier today but my little darling boy thought it would be fun to press lots of buttons and I lost the lot
I wanted to say go and find a lovely new ticker and to let you know that you are surrounded by so many supportive women in here and that everything IS ok and you WILL be bringing this bubba home with you
Anyway good on you for getting a new ticker and well done on buying a new maternity top. I need to let you know about a shop that sells awsome mat jeans too but I'll text that to you if you like. They have some great clothes and they are mostly on sale now too. How hot was it here today????? It got to 42 here too.I love summer but that is just rediculous

Bekz Thinking of you too hunny. Sending you a very supportive You are a wonderful mummy and your girls aren't going anywhere sweet.
Oh and well done to you too on buying some maternity clothes I'm secretly a little jealous of all this mat clothes shopping going on lol.

Michelle I want to let you know that we are all here for you when you feel the time is right to let your feelings out. I can't imagine how tough things are for you right now but you certainly are in my thoughts

Janie How are you doing today hun? I'm also thing about you too and sending you a great big

Lisa, Jayne,Deb,Spring, Anna and BW I hope you are all ok. I'll try and catch up with you all soon too.

[Willow]

Mako - that'd be awesome. I want to get a really nice pair this time. I've looked in Pumpkin Patch and Jeans West do them now too but meh, nothing really grabbing me.

[mako]

Willow I'm texting you now I wore mine through last winter I loved them so much and they are adjustable and super comfy

[Willow]

Mako - thanks for your text, will check them out today if I have time...who am I kidding? I'm unemployed I got plenty of time!! LOL.

Had my interview with the recruitment agency yesterday. Was fun travelling to the city in 43 heat. Not. I drove to Penrith and got an a/c country train though which I was very glad I did after seeing a story on the news last night that only 30% of Sydney's trains are a/c and they were getting temps up to 45 in the carriages yesterday. Insane.

The person I was supposed to see was sick so there was a lot of waiting around and shuffling between rooms etc which was a bit annoying. I hate those places. They made me do testing (typing, Word skills, legal spelling etc) which was completely annoying. I've been a legal sec for 10 years, if I couldn't type or spell I think someone would have noticed by now Anyway, the job I was interested in (part time, 2 days a week, 6 month contract) is with Freehills, the biggest firm in Sydney and possibly in the country. Meh. Doesn't appeal but it's only for 6 months so I could handle it I guess. I've interviewed there before years ago and the place was just horrid. So rigid and corporate which I hate. Anyway, they were going to forward my details on but haven't heard anything so not holding my breath. They're going to see if they can get me some temp work too. If I don't hear from them by next week, I'll have to register with another agency. Blah. Heard on the grapevine that about 10 people from my old work have been let go now, which is a bit of a shock. The recruitment chick was telling me it's happening with a lot of firms and ironically, Freehills let their whole float team (what I used to do) go just before xmas. How peeved would you be to be made redundant and then see them advertising for staff a month later??!!

Other than that, all good here. Must admit this redundancy gig isn't so bad when you get to sleep in till 7.15am and then have a day of shopping gotta take the kids with me but still, it's shopping. Not sure how hot it's going to be today, hoping for low 30s!

[butterfly_warrior]

Yup, Willow. Low 30s today, low 20s tomorrow! All these weather changes are giving my arthritis hell... with a southerly change and a storm yesterday I could barely walk last night, but at least it should be a much more comfortable day today. I hope the job situation resolved itself in a way that makes you happy.

I'm really proud of my accomplishments yesterday... I took Samuel to go inspect a rental property in the morning (complete dump, waste of time!) and managed to get him in and out of the car seat and sling without waking him... Then later I managed to go do some shopping in Penrith and got him in and out of the car seat and pram... However, at the last minute I balked at doing the nappy change and bottle in the shopping centre (I really should scope out the parents rooms when I don't actually NEED one) and raced home... only to get diverted as there was a bushfire in my path and the roads were closed! That was the point when I fell apart... Had DH talking to me on my mobile, the GPS giving me directions and following the detour signs... Fortunately we got home before Samuel started screaming - he's such a good baby, very quiet and laid back and at peace with the world... shame the same can't be said for his mother!

BW

[mako]

You're welcome Willow. I have to say sorry though coz when I looked at that site last night there wasn't any jeans,just 3/4 ones and a denim skirt I guess its just the in between time for stock.
Have fun shopping today and I'm jealous of the 7:15am sleep in

BW I know where you are coming from about the parents rooms at Penrith. I had to make use of 1 just before Christmas and I walked from 1 end to the other and then had to go to another level after I was given the incorrect directions from a cleaner who worked there. Not a good thing when bub has a smelly bum

We have to hit the shops today too. Need to buy a 1st birthday present for a little girl from mums group.

Sage is doing well. He is sleeping a bit better at night but the afternoon sleep is a bit of a tough gig the past few days. I'm hoping its just because its too darn hot. I actually put him in the car on Wednesday arv and drove into town and around for a bit and then home just to give him a sleep

[BekZ]

Mako - Thanks for the hugs hon. Re mat clothes I would like to avoid buying any new mat clothes because they are so expensive but this bub is the opposite season to my girls so I need summer stuff now. Thankfully I am not that big so whatever summer stuff I buy now should fit me next summer too, that is assuming the weight loss fairies don't visit me before hand!!!!

Willow - That firm sounds hideous. I was a pa/paraplanner for a financial planning firm and so want to avoid going back to the boys club corporate world. Trouble is it would be easy to go and do a refresher course and than go and study for a new career iykwim. I really admire you for daring to change.

BW - It is so unnerving when your nb starts to scream and you know he needs feeding etc. I used to panick and get myself into a state. Honestly this stage doesn't last for long. BTW I change DD in the boot of my car if the parents rooms are horrible.

Ladies what is your take on this: Should I put Loren into daycare one day per week before bub is born? She'll be around 16 months when I start her. I started Sara at 15 months but she was a very outgoing bub and I had no seperation issues with her. The downside is that Sara was sick all winter in her first year of daycare. Loren is different, very clingy to me and she gets colds and chest infections easily.

My reason for starting Loren soon would be to get her into a routine and settled and so that I can have one day per week to catch up. This one day would be very much needed when bub comes. Reasons for not putting her in: She doesn't need socialisation because we do playgroup and she has Sara and her cousins. But not going she is less likely to pick up colds etc, although Sara will bring them home. Another reason is the cost!!! I also need to bare in mind that I don't get any help from family, although Rob's mum may take her once per fortnight for a few hours.

If I don't put her in daycare DH is willing to pay for a cleaner and ironing lady for a few months.

Wow I have heaps to say today. On another note DH is not going to come to the 20wk scan with me because he doesn't want to get upset in front of me if they confirm that this bub is a girl...So my friend suggested that I tell him we are having a girl regardless. That way if bub if a boy then he'll get the surprise at the end. What do you think?

Sorry for that loooonnngg post.

[butterfly_warrior]

Always the way... as soon as I talk about how good Samuel is, he throws everything out the window and just won't sleep today. He's only quiet when he's in my arms, but at least he will be quiet somehow! So much for me either having a sleep today or getting some things put away - the sleep is more desperately needed than the tidying... What happened to my baby? Did I break him by having him out too much yesterday?

Those of you needing summer maternity clothes - if you are a size 12-14, mine are up for grabs... let me know if that will help.

BW

[BekZ]

BW - I am 12-14. You can pm me if you like. I usually found that my girls had a ferral day if they were over stimulated the day before or if we had a big weekend. Days like these you just stop doing what you are doing and have a cuddle day or take him out for a walk or give him an extra bath

[Willow]

BW - I'm sure he's just having an unsettled day, they say to expect one a week on average. I'm a 12-14 too but don't really need much other than new jeans so will let Bek have dibs. I shouldn't be all that big over summer anyway (says she who is already busting out of her clothes).

Shops were a nightmare, both kids decided not to co-operate so grabbed the bday present I needed for tomorrow (same here Mako!) got some bread and fruit and got the hell outta there!

[LisaL]

BW - you will get days like that sweets but dont stress, he should be back to his normal happy self in no time. Like the other girls said, maybe some extra cuddles and a nice walk would do you both some good.

Bek - id take the house cleaner and ironing! if the scan shows *blue* then maybe you could get some blue baloons etc and suprise DH when he gets home, dont know if I would wait til the birth though (you might want to discuss names etc).

Big hi to everyone else, Im off to get rid of some weeds from the front yard! And my bestie is coming over tonight so we can paint her name in her room in lots of different colours with butterflies and bugs etc etc...

BBL..

[LisaL]

Ps love the new ticker willow!!!

[Janie]

Hi Lovelies, I'm just home from work, and should be cooking dinner so I won't be long! DS fell asleep in the car (BUGGER!) so I'm feeling at a loss LOL.

Bek, if I were you I wouldn't wait until the birth to tell DH if it's a boy. It could cause unnecessary tension and problems. And although it would be a happy surprise, it might be a bit much to take IYKWIM? Maybe it's better to let him know in advance so he can get his head around it, and share the anticipation. That's just my take though, obviously you will know the best thing to do Have you considered not finding out the sex? Or would that cause more problems do you think? Oh, and I'd go for the cleaner and ironing lady! Whichever you choose there will be days when you wish you'd chosen the other - but I think I'd prefer more time with my kids and less time cleaning LOL. And you could still enlist your MIL's help for fortnightly babysitting

BW, don't worry, you didn't 'break' Samuel LOL. They do that from time to time (some more than others). And I hate to tell you, but they do 'wake up' at some point, and get more wakeful (no one told me, and I was really jacked off LOL). If he just wants to be with you, and you need to sleep, then sleep together! Lie on your side, with his head resting on your arm, sort of in the crook of your arm like you're cradling him IYKWIM. If you bring your knees up you can't roll over. It's a sanity saver being able to sleep together! And it's so lovely too Or have him in his sling, and sit back in a recliner or something. It's better than no sleep at all! I agree with Bek, they often seem to have trouble going to sleep when they've had a big day/night, and are overstimulated. Sometimes it just happens for no apparent reason though! I wouldn't stay at home in the hope that you have a sleeping baby

Willow, I get you on Freehills, they suck their staff dry. But if you know it's only temporary, then hey, at least it's a job! Well done on putting up your ticker, very proud of you hun xoxo

Michelle, still thinking of you Here whenever you need us.

Spring, how are things going? I miss you in here!

Deb, I hope you are all on the mend and recovering quickly

Big hi to everyone else, hope you're having a great Friday night! xoxo