Does anyone else's 3 yo pick fights with other children?

[Pony]

Imran randomly insults most other children he encounters. Luckily they and their parents usually don't understand (because when a 3 yo calls you a new fangled nonsense it just comes out as gibberish lol) so nothing comes of it but I still wish he wouldn't.
Does anyone else's child do this? How do you encourage them to amke friends not enemies?

He also does death stares which are cute but won't be for much longer.



Should I take him to a psychologist?

We have the book called When I'm Feeling Angry but I don't think they printed one called When I'm Feeling Psychopathic.

[Lulu]

I'm writing that one now....

DS would growl and pull faces. Sometimes he would push other kids because he didn't know how to say, "let's play dude".

Kinder has helped with the stuff HEAPS

[smiles4u]

Wow, that sounds full one for a 3year old but then ' most ' 3 year olds i'm around are girl's so i wonder if that makes a difference.

My DD doesn't use any physical tactics like pushing, etc ... but she can use the grumpy look of expression towards another child which is really rare.

So sorry i'm not much help ... maybe if it's deeply bothering you to ask your GP for some advice as to whether to go to a specialist or not !!!

I was also gonna ask along the line's of Lulu's comment ... Does your DS go to 3 year old Kinder ??? As it might (??) help him !!

[MantaRay]

DS2 is a lot like that too. I put some of it down to being a younger sibling and needing to learn to stand up for himself early on.

I try to talk to him about anger and better ways of expressing it. I'm not sure he understands though - he seems to only hear me when I mention food.....

[Turkish Delight]

Originally Posted by Lulu

I'm writing that one now....

If Imran doesn't go to kinder, you could try a playgroup kinda thing and/or with the warmer weather may be more visits to the park? I think the more he socialises with other kids, rather than just his sibling, he might get the hang of asking the kids to play with him. He might be in charge at home, but it'll be a different story in the playground, where he'll learn more social skills.

I don't think he needs to see a psych. He's 3 for heaven's sake. May be if he was 7-8 and he was still taunting kids, then yeah i'd consider seeing a psych. He is still a baby.

[krysalyss]

DS can be a bit like this. He easily feels defensive around toys he likes, although it is usually only a problem wiht kids he doesn't know - he is fine at mums group. I jump in right from the beginning to involve the other kids to help set up a game. He then seems to take the lead from me. I am going with the whole 'lead by example' tactic and hope it helps him learn those skills as he gets a bit older. It seems to be helping.

[Pony]

I think you're right Lulu - he is trying to make friends but he has no clue how to. He's a bit shy so maybe I should be looking on the bright side which is that at least he's trying lol.
He goes to cc once a week but he spends as much time as he can with Yasin not with the other children. He's with Yasin pretty much everywhere we go and he usually plays with him when we're visiting not other children.

I guess that for now I'll just try not to panic.

[smiles4u]

... maybe it's possible his shyness is frustrating him, ... yeh, i agree have him amongst lots of other ' new 'children & hopefully he will find his way xox

[Lulu]

I would say for sure (as you can be over the net) that it's that he doesn't know how to. Once we were at the shops and ds did the growl/death stare to another child. His mum just smiled and said "ooh we did growling too", so I felt better about it.

Once DS met another boy on the train that must have had the same problem because they growled, pulled faces, then punched each other sorta-kinda friendly-like, then grinned, launched at each other and rolled about the crowded train floor most of the way home. They did settle at some stage and were pleased as punch (he he) to find a friend. I think that was the first friend he made on his own.

Now he is at Kinder had some CC experience he approaches kids differently. I did lead the way with "would you like to play etc", but Kinder really consolidated it.

xoxoxo

[Pony]

PMSL Lulu, you remined me of dinner a couple of weeks ago. We went with friends who have a daughter about Imran's age. They sat opposite each other and pulled terrible faces for the entire meal.

[rayray]

Milo is very similar, and hes nearly four.
He seems to make friends ok, but it takes a while, hes not one to go to the park and play with other kids, though he will talk 'at' them or yell things.