Too young to be left alone at home for an hour or two?

[Shades]

Just wanting some opinions - my stepdad sees nothing wrong with leaving my (only just) 8yr old brother home alone for an hour or two during the day... My mum and I both have issues with it but as they live separately we can't always do anything about it - she's spoken to him and he reckons we're paranoid... It's not a superb area that he lives in, and Riley is not the most independent of children.

So how old is 'old enough' to be left home alone and for how long?

[diannescruffy]

Personally for me I wouldn't leave my 8yr old DD alone, she would be too scared and I really think it's a bit young. I have left my DS 11 and DD8 alone together but it was only for 15min while I drove down to the shops. We started leaving our eldest DS alone when he was 12 but for no more than half an hour.

Regards,
Dianne

[lilima]

No way is 8 old enough to be home their own. They are not even out of Primary School. In depends on the maturity of each child, but 8 is def not onld enough regardless of maturity,

[Marlene]

I only started leaving my kids alone to duck to the corner shop etc when they were 12ish.
8 years old is too young in my opinion.

[rayray]

I dont htink Id leave my kids home along at that age.
I know my parents didnt leave us home along til I was 13, my brother would have been 12. This was after school for 2ish hours.
And they still werent really keen on that, but they knew all the neighbours quite well and knew who would be home etc

[lilima]

Just wnated to add, leaving an 8 year old home with an older sibling might be OK, depending on the age of the other sibling, and if the 8 yo will actually listen to their bro or sis

[Shades]

Okay so you all seem to be in agreement that it's too young - does anyone have any ingenious suggestions for us, given that talking to his father has zero effect?

[MantaRay]

At 9 I was picking my 6 yo sister up from school and together we'd go down 2 blocks to pick up our 3yo sister from day care. Then we'd all walk home and I'd look after my sisters until mum got home. Except when I stayed at school to play with friends and forgot my sisters and mum got panicked phone calls from all over!!

Would I leave my kids home alone at that age - not a chance!

[Cass_Blob]

How times have changed Manta! (trying not to make you sound old since i don't know how old you are) but my mum use to do the same thing when she was nine, looking after her siblings, but she and I wouldn't do that in this day and age!

I think 8 is a bit to young, does anyone know the legalities of leaving children home alone at what age is legally allowed...

[MantaRay]

Cass, that's ok, I am old LOL!! I think I've heard that the "legal" age is 12.

[mrsmac]

Can you find some brouchure that states it's too young to be left alone? Is there some formal legal agreement re access? Can she ask her solicitor to tell him that its not on??
I have left my 9 year old for 20 minutes once or twice but she is very mature and I would never leave her for a few hours.

[diannescruffy]

Was wondering about the legal age too!!
Shades if it is 12 you could tell your SD that it is illegal to leave your brother home alone.


Regards,
Dianne

[Butterfly Child]

Yeh i tend to agree i recon 11 to 12 aswell.. What about mentioning the legal age is 12 as Mantaray said.. apart from that not much great advise im sorry

[jasp]

I agree that 8 is too young...as for what age is ok I think it depends on the child.
DS2 is 7 & I can't imagine leaving him alone at 8. We do leave him with his almost 12 yr old brother though if we are going to the supermarket (or his 14yo sister when she's around). DS1 is 12 in a few weeks & we leave him on his own. He likes it makes him feel grown up
There are other factors...we live in a gated complex & it's full of adults who know us & our kids so if they really needed help it wouldn't be far away.

I like Mrsmac's idea, if you can find some literature stating that 8 is too young...

Failing that it might be an idea to make sure that your brother has a backup plan... can he call someone if he needs, how far away would help be, are there neighbours nearby that he knows, etc.

ETA Mantaray isn't it funny how times have changed! (now I sound old lol) my stepmum used to leave 8yo me with my 4yo sister while she went power walking. I wouldn't dream of it myself...

[LimeSlice]

I was left home at 8... I personally dont see a problem with it if the child in question is mature enough to handle the situation, is aware how to and how not to behave and has someone to call on should something go wrong (ie neighbours or a family friend or can contact the paretns easily) In my day (lol) we didnt even have mobile phones, so you really were on your own! lol but as I said I have no issue if the child is responsible enough to handle the sitch

[murraysmum]

with having 2 brothers who are both younger and same age ones adopted
they wernt left alone till they were in year 8 and even then one of us was home and still they hate beeing home alone and prefer one of us at home which i think is great like my bro says he likes his privacy but he feels more safe with another person in the house

frankly i wouldnt as 8 is a bit young

[Shades]

Okay I had a look and there doesn't seem to be any 'legal age' as such but official 'recommendations' seem to be that children be left with appropriate supervision up until at least 12 years of age... so we'll mention that and see if it helps. Thanks ladies

Limeslice - he is not a very independent child - he's quite vague and absent-minded as a rule - I don't have enough faith in his ability to act appropriately in a crisis. My mum and I won't even let him wait in the car when we run in to the shops for 5 mins!!

[~breeze~]

My twin sister & I were left home alone from around 8yrs old. Mine was due to Mum & Dad running their own business & the shop was open 7am til 9pm every day (7 days a week). Mum or Dad would get home before dinner time though. Its funny how a few of you have said "how things have changed". A bit off subject here but when mum & dad bought their house,it had a swimming pool without a fence. My sister & I were 7yrs old & never learnt to swim. We would come home from school strip off on theback deck & jump in the pool. We tought ourselves how to swim!! Lucky to be alive if you ask me LOL But I could never let my kids do that! (things have certainly changed!)

I cant see me leaving Brianna home alone at 8yrs old, but I wont know until I get to that age. She is very mature for her age & very trustworthy following rules etc so I dont know

I guess it does depend on the child, you said he's not very independant.... on that alone he shouldn't be left on his own. Thats not fair to him.

I hope you can convince your SD it's not right.