Our baby boy was born sleeping.

[firemother]

Hi everyone

It has been a long time since I had a look at this site. A few days after I did my intro I had some bleeding. At the time we had left Darwin and had decided to go back home to Perth as I was so sick of driving. We got to Katherine and stopped for the night cause I wasn't feeling that great. The next morning I started having pains so we came back to Darwin but by then I was bleeding pretty heavily. We went straight to the hospital. They put me on a monitor and found a heart beat but it was really low. It sounded so different to our other scan I just knew something wasn't right. At first they thought is was placental abruption, then I was told I was in labour. It just seemed like no one could tell us what was wrong. After a bit the bleeding slowed down and the doctor told us that even though there was heart beat there wasn't anything they could do, we were losing our baby. At around 2 am the next morning I gave birth to our beautiful little boy Flynn. He was so tiny and so perfect. We got to spend a few hours with him before they took him away. I was in hospital for 2 days and then discharged myself. We have some great friends in Darwin who let us stay for a few weeks. We got back to Perth and to be honest it was just to much. Seeing the clothes and bassinet we had bought was just hard so a few days later I came back to the NT while Tess stayed in Perth (she had work). We have decided to move up here (I have been offered a job). Tess has a few days to work out before she can come up plus a few stick of furniture to sell. We hope to be in our own place by Christmas. As for more babies, I can't think about that right now. I feel that I let Flynn down, he looked so perfect, everything was going ok. We still don't know why this happened to us. The hospital told us that it happens in 1 in 200 cases (like that makes us feel better). It wasn't an abruption in the end it was just nature (as one genius of a student doctor told us). I just don't get it.

I am so sorry to hear about your loss, I cant imagine what you have been through. I can understand why you wouldn't want to even think about babies now after what you and Tess have been through. Starting over in a new place might be a fresh start for you. Just make sure you have plenty of support around you when you need it, it takes time to learn to live with the grief. Your little angel Flynn is watching over you now. Wishing you all the best. We may hear from you later. Remember there is always the late loss threads on BB here. You may want to talk to people who have been through the same experience.

Leanne

[MrsB26]

I am so sorry for the passing of baby Flynn. I wish i had some more words of comfort i am glad that you felt ready to share his story with us. You didnt let Flynn down, it wasnt your fault

[Spring Angel]

Sweetie, I am so very sorry for the loss of your sweet little son Flynn. I lost my first son Harrison and the pain seems almost unbearable. But just know that you are not alone and there are plenty of wonderful women here on BB who can help support you.

Be kind to yourself and let yourself grieve your little lad.

Lv Spring.

[Snacks]

Mate, I am just so sorry
I wish I could say something that will help, but I know I can't. I just wish you all the best for your move, and that you might be able to take time out to look after yourself and grieve for your little Flynn. Take care.

[~Leasha~]

I'm so sorry I am thinking if you both xxx

[Shades]

I am so sorry... just try hard to remember - it was not your fault.

[rachel6188]

im so sorry for your loss..my thoughts are with you both xxxx