17mo DS's sleep seriously deteriorating!!

[Cherie]

Background: He started sleeping through the night (12 hrs) from 12 weeks of age to 6 months old. This was from no routine/program/crying-it-out. Just him, finding his own rhythm.

For the last 12 months he has been waking 2-3 times a night. For a while, all he wanted was a quick cuddle, and then was happy to go back down in his cot, awake usually, and go back to sleep.

For the last 3 weeks though .... holy hell He's been up 4-5 times a night and he's really difficult to get back down.
- Cuddles don't work anymore. I can cuddle him for 30 mins, and as soon as I go to put him back in his cot he starts screaming on the way down.
- Co-sleeping doesn't work - it never has. He thinks our bed is for playing and talking, not for sleeping. So if we bring him into our bed, it does stop the screaming. And he chills out for maybe 5 or 10 mins. But then he starts crawling round everywhere, talking, jumping, getting off the bed and dismantling the bedside tables ... you get the idea.
- Bottle of milk doesn't work, even though in the past it has been our secret weapon for when nothing else works.
- Going for a drive in the car doesn't work. He just talks the whole time, then cries when we get home and put him down for a sleep.

I'm totally at my wits end. Last night, he woke up 5 times. Each time it took us an hour or more to get him back to sleep. In between wakings, I was so wired that I couldn't go back to sleep, thus would still be awake the next time he woke up. At 4am, I got sick of trying, and took him out and sat in front of the TV (on low) until 6.30am when he FINALLY FELL ASLEEP. I only got 2 hrs sleep last night - between 6.30am and 8.30am. I am so tired (not to mention first trimester fatigue).

Day sleeps he's OK .... difficult to get down (will only fall asleep in the car or at home) ... but generally naps for 1-2 hrs which I'm happy with. Day sleeps used to be my biggest problem. Now they're the easiest part.

Any suggestions for the nighttime battles. Frankly, gentle sleep techniques are not working.

[Nelle]

Couldn't read and not post a hug. No idea, Riv's in a big boy bed on the floor (castors removed), and we just shut his door, he plays until he decides to sleep, and we let him out when he wakes up in the morning.

Does he have toys in his cot, that he can just play with until he falls asleep? You know the whole 'you don't have to sleep, just play quietly' thing?

[Cherie]

Thanks Nelle. I haven't actually thought about toys, so will give that a try tonight when he wakes. I have a feeling that it probably won't work - he doesn't play with toys during the day unless I'm there playing too - but at this stage, I'm willing to try just about anything!

[Trillian]

Man, this is the last thing you'd feel up to dealing with right now Do you remember me talking about Paige's sleep being really bad a few years ago? She was just like Jambin is and it nearly wrecked me mentally. She was in a big bed by then though, so I used to sleep in there with her most of the time and that seemed to work. She would also have total freak outs over nothing and was just beside herself, so I just had to stay with her until it passed. There wasn't anything specific that I did, I just rode it out for a few weeks and she gradually got better until she was back to normal. We have no idea why it started either. I know you said co-sleeping doesnt work, but have you tried it somewhere else in the house? Like on the lounge? I used to sleep with the kids on the lounge if I had to as opposed to putting them in our bed. he isn't going to have the same associations with somewhere different as he does with your bed.

[Cherie]

Actually Sherie, I've contemplated buying him a toddler bed for just that reason - wondering if cosleeping would work better in 'his' environment, rather than our bed(playground). I wish we had a mattress I could put on the floor of his bedroom. Then I could sleep while he roamed around and did whatever he wanted. Thanks for the reminder - it's something I'll seriously consider if we're still going like this is a couple of weeks. I'm hopeful after what you said about Paige that it might just be a stage he's going through, and he'll grow out of it eventually.

[Trillian]

It's still so frustrating though isn't it when there appears to be no reason for them doing it. I am really hoping that in a couple of weeks you don't have to worry about that mattress.

[Erin_25]

Charlie was exactly the same, slept great from early on til he cut his first tooth at 6months, he then cut one every week (or so it felt) and started waking a couple times a night. Though he's always gone back down no fuss with a bottle or cuddle etc. We've had a rough winter & have had some wake ups where he will just scream, not take the bottle but as soon as upright with cuddle fine til back into bed. We've since figured out it's been an ear ache each time...just a thought but have you had his ears checked?
Other than that I've got no help...sorry.