Our Sleep Plan - Support and Encouragement needed

[Heaven]

Thanks everyone! Well, night one started off badly but turned out to actually be the best night we've had in a while.

So, I rocked her to sleep the first time. She wakes up as soon as we put her down unless we hold her for like over 1/2 hr first!! So we're starting with rocking her until she's asleep but not in a deep sleep where she'd usually wake up if we put her down (instead of rocking til sleepy, we'll get there). Anyway, so she woke up on my first attempt to put her down. DH then did the next few times coz my arms were killing already (hence why we have to fix this now!). Then we were fed up, she kept crying as soon as she realised we were trying to put her down. We had a moment of 'this is just stupid' 'it's not working' 'this stupid plan is never going to work' 'wtf are we going to do' LOL. We put her down for about 2 mins and she screamed but we needed to breathe and regroup, LOL. Then I cried bc she was crying and I thought things were never going to get better. Night one, lol, we're tough aren't we?

So then we started again. DH rocked her and then she went down first try. Possibly wore herself out with the crying and staying up so late. It was 9.30 by the time she went down. She slept until 12 in her cot (longest she's slept in there for the last week). Then had a feed in bed and we fell asleep and woke up at 3am (longest sleep she's had in about a month!). Then I fed her again in bed and she fell asleep. She was unwrapped so we knew if we tried to move her she'd wake up. She was really restless so we thought she was going to wake up soon. We thought we should try put her in her cot but decided we would do it when she woke up (which we thought would be very soon) but she slept until 5.30am (her normal wake up time).

So, we did the rocking plan thing for the first sleep but ended up cosleeping for the rest of the night. But it was the best night we've had in ages. Lately she has not been falling straight back to sleep after a feed and has also been staying up between 1am and 3am!! Last night was much more like she used to be, just waking for feeds then sleeping soundly. I'm ok with waking for feeds as long as I don't have to be up for hrs trying to get her back to sleep.

So...we shall see what tonight holds, hope she doesn't crack us again, pmsl.

[Kmn]

You don't have to be tough, just sensible - congratulations on your better night!

[funkeeefrog]

i don't think that she cracked you. You managed to get her to have her first stretch of sleep in her cot which is awesome. That's how we started, then gradually started putting her back in there after a feed instead of in the bed with us. Hope you can do it again with less stress tonight

[MamaPan]

well done honey.... that's a great 1st night of your new plan....
hope tonight you get through with less tears from both of you...

[Mak]

Well done! Sounds like a great star. x

[aimz78]

just wanted to wish you good luck and say its great you have such a well thought out plan! I think it helps
Sending good sleep vibes into your household!

[SamiH]

like Krystie - I need routine myself but with mr Z #3 - all his sleep times co-incided with school drop offs and pick ups has been really hard!.

good luck - consistency and therefore predictability really is the key.

My baby consistently wakes at 3am laughing and cooing and I consistently cant stand being kept awake (even though happily) for any longer than 15 mins and feed him - but he consistently goes back to sleep so I am ok with that

[Mumma2three]

Good luck, Im pretty much doing exactly the same as we speak. I've had DH go into resettle when he wakes for first time at night (our bed is between 6.30pm and 6.50pm) usually between 10-11pm, then I feed at about midnight. My aim is now to not feed at the 3pm wake up and hope he can resettle until about 5ish (his wake time is 6am after feeding on and off from 5am).
So I'll be thinking of you!! Hang in there. Some nights are harder than others. I have also just introduced three meals a day as of today as DS was getting hungry during day (I was doing breakfast and dinner only). Hoping that will help.
xo

[Heaven]

FFS!!!!!!!! Ready to let her CIO about now.
She has been awake for 5hrs so is obviously tired. The trying to stop rocking to sleep thing is not working, it just makes it worse. Each time we try to put her down again she knows what's coming and just gets more and more upset. It's waking her up more, not making her more sleepy. She WILL NOT finish going to sleep in her own bed at all. Can't even put her down when she's sound asleep. Totally over it.

[Dollyroux]

Hugs. Nothing useful to add but that I'm feeling for you and good luck x x

[anna]

Don't stress hun! Deep breaths!

Just feed/rock her to sleep so she actually gets to sleep and try again with the next awakening. Sleep is essential for self settling. An overtired baby will not settle on their own!!!!

You're doing a great job, but you may have to throw in the towel on tonight and just try again when she's had a bit of sleep.

Hugs!!!!!!!!

[Ginger]

oh heaven, i wish i had a helpful suggestion but i don't- just a big hug for you, i know how frustrating the whole sleep thing is

[Mak]

Hang in there Heaven - you are trying to change the world as she knows it. It will take small steps, a good friend told me she found it took 3/4 days to get changes with sleep implemented and you have to ride through it.
I have always found day 2 of any change the tricky bit - as bubs realises the change you made on the first is not just an accident IYKWIM.
Anna has given you some great suggestions - but please be kind to yourselves, it will get better in a few days. She will be feeling your stress too.

Sending you heaps of sleep vibes - perhaps go and reaffirm/refresh yourself with your plan. xxx

[rufalina]

Hun, I know I am coming in late here, but just remember that what you are doing is going to take some time and helping DD change her habits is hard work. But, if you stick with it, it will be worth it in the long run.

When I was following this book, the one thing that got my through was, when I hit a wall like you are at now, I just went back a step (for me that was boob feeding to sleep) and next time went back to the routine. I know that can make it take longer, but, it does work. I would pat and cuddle DS, but eventually would give in with the boob, but made sure to stop his feed just before he fell asleep then start the patting again. It does work. I know it doesn't feel like it now, but you can do this.

[Heaven]

Thankyou everyone for your support. She ended up just being wide awake again so we gave up for a bit. No point killing our arms rocking when she's wide awake staring at you. So she played on the floor in the lounge room laughing and rolling around for a while Then when she was tired again we started to put her to sleep. And found she had a dirty nappy OMG, hope that wasn't the problem the whole time!! Anyway, she's just gone to sleep in DHs arms.
Great, just heard him try and put her down and she's crying again, awesome.

[Willow]

Just wanted to offer you my support and encouragement and a big hug!!

Sleeping issues are so, so, so hard My DS1 gave us a really rough time, but eventually we got there, and you will too!! Good on you for taking active steps to help you and your baby to sleep better, took me a lot longer to bite the bullet!

[shellbell3]

I feel for you. We had sleep issues with DD1. Its so hard the first few days but you prolly need to give it 3 days to see an improvement. Hope she settles for you.

[Mak]

Heaven - How are you going this morning? x