How do you stop co-sleeping?

[Artechim]

My DS has co-slept since he was 12 weeks old. He is now nearly 2. A few months ago we shifted him to his own bed (his idea, he wanted to go there at bedtime) but I continued to sleep in there with him planning to move back to my bed once he was settled in his own room.

Unfortunately he still wakes anywhere from 2-6 times per night but I can't sleep in his bed with him anymore because I am far too pregnant to fit in with him comfortably and I was getting very little sleep. So I moved back to my own bed but it is not going well. When he wakes he comes into our room so DH or I take him back to bed and sit with him until he falls back to sleep. If DH takes him back, there is always a huge tantrum because he wants me but he will usually go back to sleep within 10-20 minutes. If I take him back to bed he will settle straight away but as soon as I go to leave the room he is suddenly awake and I am stuck there for hours.

Last night was a combo of the two - he had a massive tantrum for DH, then woke up and had another every time DH tried to leave the room. It went on for 3 hours.

I am not sure what to do. I know the crying is only a ploy to get me to come to him (yelling tantrum cry) and once I am there he won't let me get away.

At this point we are willing to try just about anything, I really need him sleeping better before the new baby arrives.

[Hollo]

when you figure it out let me know! we have both kids with us, had to get a king size bed. DD1 only comes in around 3-5am though.

[boomba]

We did it gradually! We started by putting his junior bed in our room so he knew we were not going anywhere ( might not be possible in some rooms even ours was a tight squeeze )

Then once he was sleeping all night we just moved his bed and made a big deal about it that its a big boy bed etc

I personally think dont try to rush the transistion, and if it means a few more sleepless nights to do it calmly and so your child feels safe then its worth it!

It will happen good luck xx

[Ginger]

arte- i agree with boomba
have you tried putting his bed in your bedroom? next to your bed?

[Inertia]

I always found that really - you don't, they do.

Originally Posted by boomba

We did it gradually! We started by putting his junior bed in our room so he knew we were not going anywhere ( might not be possible in some rooms even ours was a tight squeeze )

This is what we have done with Harry. His bed is in our room now and he was utterly thrilled about that - but its a small toddler bed so we could just fit it in. It is still yet to work but thankfully he sleeps through so as soon as he falls asleep next to us, DH moves him into his bed and he wakes up there every morning. Eventually he will get the idea *sigh* Until then its a bit of a tight squeeze at bedtime, lol.

[Chocaholic]

We have a trundle bed under DS1's bed. I slept in that while DS slept in the "big boys bed". He woke up a couple of times a night to ask "where you mummy?". I was able to say "right here". He went straight back to sleep. The main advantage was I had my own space to sleep but was right next to him and could touch him if he needed physical reassurance.

Once he slept through the night a couple of times without waking up, I moved back into my bed but left the trundle ready in case. There were a couple of nights i slept part of the night in there (from about 2.30am onwards) but DS1 has been really great for a while now.

The trundle cost us about $100 on special so was well worth it. Also we have a lot of visitors so it will be well used.

Also, I found that once he had his Winnie in bed with him, he slept much better. Winnie (a teddy) was a favourite toy when he was almost 1 and even then he never paid all that much attention to it but he seems to use it as a comfort toy now.

Good luck!

[AliBaby]

Bribery???
Not sure on how successful it is but thought I would share a story with you about my little brother and how my step mum stopped him coming into their bed in the middle of the night.

Zander at age 5, was coming in the middle of the night so my step mum said to him, "If you stay in your bed all night you can have some money for an iceblock at the canteen tomorrow."

This worked a couple of nights and my step mum was thinking, this is great!!!

Then one night Zander went in there in the middle of the night and my step mum sleepily said to him, "oh well, there is no iceblock at school tomorrow" to which he replied...."Thats okay mummy, the canteen is closed tomorrow." cheeky little monkey! How clever is that! And he was right.

Anyway point to the story, if you are going to bribe, make sure it is something that you can follow through on the following day!

Good Luck....I will be in your position one day so you can tell me what works

[~Sally~]

I was fine with Brendan (2yr5m) coming into our bed during the night until Tristan was born... most will say it's a bad idea to make sudden changes so close to a new baby, but you have to do what you have to do and I put the cot mattress (DS1 has his own toddler bed) on the floor on my side of the bed and he is happy to sleep there most of the night, once he comes in. He still gets into our bed but it's not usually until 6am or so. Then there was four

So both boys start off in their own beds, and end up in ours... so we all get the best of both worlds.