Sleeping beyond a sleep cycle

[roses]

Not sure if this is the right spot to post this thread so if not then please move mods.

My DS is five and a half months old and he really dosen't manage to get past one sleep cycle in the day sleeps. I realise that this is probably because he isn't self settling - which I am trying very hard to make work. For the last two months I have pretty much spent inside our house trying to get some good sleeping habits happening but it seems to no avail.
I have been to tressilian and am due to return this week again but he still isn't getting proper day sleeps. I know he needs more sleep because he gets cranky earlier and dosen't make it to the next (four hour) cycle. So far this is what I am trying.
Tired signs - straight into cot in sleeping bag - once calm I leave the room. If he becomes agitated then I enter and calm him down - I leave again before he is asleep. Once this has gone on for 40 mins I then pat him while shooshing the whole time. This morning he still had not gone off with patting for 30 mins so I gave him the dummy. (Immediate sleep). I am trying to wean him off the dummy as he needs to self settle (i.e. I cannot continue getting up every hour during the night to find dummy and put it back in his mouth).

Sorry if I have rambled on but it was a very difficult night last night. And this morning is no easier - quite sleep deprieved. Has anyone had similar issues. - was there something you did that worked for you. I know I have to give him time but I feel like I'm at the same stage we were at when he was 3 months. BTW - I can't wrap him as he is a big roller and is always rolling in the cot.

Thanks in advance for and help - I'm desperate!!

[shellbell3]

We had to get rid of the dummy at 4 months, same reason sick of getting up all night replacing it.
Instead I started giving her a soft comforter toy but she herself now has decided to make her blanket her comforter.
What I did was stay with her but kept patting, rolled her on her side and rocked her, whatever worked to keep her calm, if she was quiet I'd just rub her gently til she was asleep. First sleep took about an hour but then each started to improve. And nights esp were soooo much better.
It did still take awhile for her to learn to go into 2nd sleep cycle and even now some days she will some days she won't.
After the first day, when I felt more confident I could do it I threw out all the dummies so I couldn't be tempted to go back.
Maybe try sleeping bag instead wrapping? That could also help as a cue that its sleep time.

[~Trish~]

Day sleeps can be such hard work can't they?

My DS2 would alway wake after one sleep cycle too. He would wake up after 40 minutes of sleep, I could have set my watch by him LOL. What eventually worked for us was I would watch the time when he went to sleep. I would then sneak into his room a couple of minutes before his 40 minute cycle was about to end and I would watch him. At 40 minutes he would stir (he'd sigh and move his head), as soon as he did this (and before he had fully woken) I started patting his tummy. This would help him move into the next sleep cycle without waking up.

I have to say that it didn't work for every nap, but it would usually work for at least one of his naps a day. I kept persisting and then one day he didn't need me anymore, he could resettle himself.

I hope you find something that works for you soon .

[curly173]

I hear your pain. My son was like that for a very very long time. I was fortunate though that he didn't take a dummy, however, I used to let him fall asleep on the breast up until about 7 months old (!!) http://forums.bellybelly.com.au/foru...s/rolleyes.gif
I spent the first 5 months of his day time naps putting him back to sleep about every hour and a half and (approx 5 times a day) and I was beside myself (curiously he mostly slept during the night.) but I was tired and frustrated.
Anyway I used to put him into the cot on his back, and then one day found that putting him in on his belly worked a treat and he moved to something that resembled 1 & 1/2 hours.
Then I weaned him at 9 months and put him directly onto cows milk and we never looked back (until now, he's 14 months & we are going through 'something' but that's a different issue)
So, in short, I wanted to say that eventually it will pass and if you stick to the routine (as hard as it is, and I also hardly ever left the house to make sure the routine stayed in place and I was determined to get this baby to go over a sleep cycle and missed out on joining mother's groups etc) your hard work will pay off. When I stopped letting him fall asleep on my breast I was so surprised at how easily he accepted it and wished I had started sooner. Anyway hang in there, you'll be surprised at how fast this stage will pass and soon he will drop a couple of sleep cycles on his own.

[Panda74]

Hey roses, I feel your pain too! My DS is nearly 8 months and we've just been through about 4 months of me hovering to resettle DS 30 minutes into EVERY nap. It is so frustrating and exhausting! I too tried to remove sleep associations (DS feeds to sleep) but was spectacularly unsuccessful there.

Anyway, about 3 weeks ago I put DS down for a morning nap and waited for the 30 - 40 stirring and it didn't happen! He slept for 1.5 hours without needing booby! He did it again that afternoon and again the next morning (night times are bit messier, dont get me started!). Since then we've had some shorter naps and I have needed to resettle at the half hour mark occasionally but generally its longer than that and I am pretty confident in saying the 30 minute sleep cycle thing is over.

So no advice for you, just a big fat useless 'it will get better' . I did absolutely nothing to change DS, he's just a big boy now I reckon.

Good luck!
Panda

[farmgirl77]

Hi Roses,
Not sure if I can offer much support - except to say that I could have written this post myself! I was doing exactly as you were, but with no improvement, so I've tried a bit of a change. I stay in the room till DS is quiet, and then leave. If he starts to cry I stand at the door and watch him (had to change the furniture in the room around to do this) - if he is distressed, I go in, but if he is crying to settle I leave him and just watch him - ready to go in if I need to. I know he is crying to settle if 1. his face is not upset eg screwed up etc, it is just his mouth opening to let out sound 2. his fist is in his mouth 3. there is gaps between the crys rather than a constant cry. After a sleep cycle, he generally starts to make a crying sound again, but his eyes will be closed - so I go in, touch him to let him know that I am there, and then again just watch him from the side of the cot so that I can comfort him if he becomes distressed. I'm finding that he is now going back to deep sleep after letting off a few crys.

I'm not sure if this is the kind of settling that BB supports, but I've found that it is the only way that DS is learning to resettle himself - he will now go past a sleep cycle for one or two sleeps a day. I am always ready to go and pick him up if he becomes distressed, but try not interven if he is just crying/making noise to help himself settle. It has been hard, and I've needed help to observe the different noises and signs he makes before I've had the confidence to do this.

Good luck and I hope that you find a way to help that you feel happy and comfortable with.
FG

[K'nJ's]

Hi Everybody,

This is the first time I have ever posted and after checking out a lot of forums trying desperately to find a solution to my baby boy's catnapping I decided to sign on to this one as you all seem very down to earth and not at all scripted.

I have a 3 year old daughter who catnapped until I started her on Tizzy Hall's routine at 16 weeks it worked immediately and she has been a dream (pardon the pun) ever since. Her problem was I didn't allow her to self settle and therefore she was unable to resettle herself the the next sleep cycle. So when I was expecting my now 17 week old son, I was sure I was not going to make that mistake again and all would be easy...... how silly I was!!! He has self settled pretty much from birth, he feeds beautifully and although he has battled reflux, with losec he is coping fine.... but still he naps, you name it I have tried it, I even bought an electric rocker in the hope that would keep asleep but no, that was a waste of money. I am sure some mums don''t see it as a problem but for me it is an exhausting nightmare that I can see no end too. Very occasionally he will sleep a bit longer and I get all excited but the very next sleep he is back to 40 minutes on the dot!

I only wish I could give you all a solution because I seriously share your pain. If I ever work it out you will be the first to know.......

Thanks