Skye, big big hugs hun, it sounds like you're really doing the hard yards there! Thanks for having the courage to speak up and ask for help and advice. Don't be down on yourself for feeling the way you do under very trying circumstances, you know yourself how important it is to get some strategies in place and are taking those steps, so well done.
I just wanted to mention a couple of strategies that I've heard about that you might consider trying either before medication or as a longer term strategy to wean off medication (if you're uncomfortable yourself with using medication).
One of them is to try a full elimination diet (with the help of a dietician). Sugar is not the only thing that can set sensitive kids off. You can find more information at
Sue Dengate's website and
The Royal Prince Alfred website (they wrote a really good book called Friendly Food). Often, the worst culprits are fresh foods that are high in naturally occuring chemicals, like mushrooms, corn, tasty cheese and tomatoes. The effect can be cumulative and you won't be able to identify the triggers unless you try an elimination diet.
The second thing you could try is a biofeedback therapy that has been in use now for a couple of decades which involves retraining the brain waves using a series of computer games. Tony Franklin is one respected psych I know who has been using this therapy for years with good results in the NT. He has also had good results from using Omega 3 oils (like fish oils) as a dietary supplement.
The final thing I want to mention that I think is really important is to get some help and support for yourself. This might mean finding an ADHD support network, or find out if there's a behaviour support unit in your area that you can contact for some advice. People who understand how hard it is and have some strategies for calm and positive parenting that you can start doing so that every little thing isn't a battleground. You should be able to locate some help on the
Families NSW website.
Good luck with it, it can only get better!!